uncle zul

yesterday (20th oct 2011), i've lost my greatest mentor, uncle zul. why he is such a greatest mentor to me? why not my father? i say, both are my greatest mentors. my father is my no.1 mentor. but at this very moment, uncle zul is my no.1 greatest mentor. while baba was in the icu. unconscious. the one who came to me and my brother was uncle zul. he kept motivating us no matter what. he entertained us with his words. tried to let us forget about tears but a smile.
i remember when he spent time with us. he told us to put some smile while talking to baba, encourage him to eat, pray and have fun while it last. he told us to pray a lot. he told us to spend more time while baba is around. i admit, i hardly listened to others. but not him. uncle zul was a true fighter. he was diagnosed with a bone cancer for almost 22 years. i have seen him suffered with bone cancer eversince i was 9 years old. now i'm 23. so, guess age is not a matter. but time. that is why i say he is a true fighter. hope baba will be just like him.
at first when i heard the news, i was shocked. but i didn't cried that much. because i was thinking. he has been suffered with cancer for 22 years. and i believe that, now, ALLAH had called him and said "dear my dearest umat, it's time for you to come HOME." unfortunately, i was in sarawak. felt so bad of not coming home. saying goodbye to my greatest mentor. i'm so thankful to ALLAH that i have a uncle like him. caring and a good motivator. futhermore, he is one friendly man. just like baba. uncle zul, may you rest in peace. i'm going to miss having you around. take care. thank you for comforting me. your words are what i need now. al-fatihah...

we all will going to miss you, uncle zul.

♥BABA, FATHER, WALID, DADDY! ♥

his name is MAHAT BAHAMAN. he is my father. he has been a great father to me and my brother for alongtime and hope forever (insya ALLAH). we love to argue with each other. oh well, that is how we share our knowledge or exchange our thought or opinion on something. sometimes the discussion can also turn ups to be a fight. haha. it is funny how the kids fight with their father. at the end all of us are right. haha. baba was born on 17th september 1975 (i forgot the year). but what i remember is his date same as mine. we both were born on the same date, 17th. hehe. that may explained pretty much how close baba and me. i remember when my first time further my study away from both my parents. the one that always disturb me from morning until night, is my father. baba will start with a funny greeting. for example like "hai, tengah buat apa?" "hai, dah makan" sometimes i found out that sort of hai things is kinda funny for him at his age. but yeah he is a funny guy. a good singer. and a good annoying person. like father like daughter. i'm also annoying same as him. but now things change. baba was diagnosed with a cancer pancreatic. at first, me, mama and abang thought our life will turn down. doctors and nurses had given us the spirit to be happy. they always advise us saying "don't cry in front of him. keep smiling. while he is still here, always be with him." i can't help it. i cried a lot when everytime i see his picture laying on the hospital bed. doing MRI. but i didn't teared in front of him. hell no. what a coincidence is that. the time he got diagnosed with cancer pancreatic. i was on my way back to continue my 2md year of degree in sarawak. i feel bad of leaving mama alone to handle him. and of course him. since we both are close, we both love to teas mama. not to be beside him for 24/7 is the worst thing that i shouldn't do. but baba insisted me to continue my degree back to sarawak. he is on his critical level of cancer. the doctor told us that 3 quater of his pancreas is covered with tumor. YA ALLAH! hearing that never a good thing for me to go on studying in sarawak. so, that is why i had decided to come back home today. be with him, not 24/7 but just for 4 days i think would be ok. at least i know the truth about his condition. hurm. right now, praying to ALLAH is the best way to do. at the same time, sending him to any medical center to not healing his tumor but decreasing the size of tumor from getting worst. fuh! right now, crying wont help anything. i have to be brave, strong to my family no matter what. and first comes first, degree for him to see. insya ALLAH.

baba, i love you so much. i do. please, be strong for us. you have been fighting with this cancer since the first day of your operation. and i'm hoping of you to saty stronger from now until forever. i love you, baba. i love you so much. i promise i will finish my degree no matter what. for you. i love you. please be strong for us. *crying all alone in the room while listening to the radio*

i don't want the smile on his face fade away. please keep smiling baba. just keep smiling. your smile tells me that you are ok. no matter what. keep smiling baba ♥